Anal adventures and complicated relationships

Anal sex is something that I have never tried very much and have never been curious about.  I have owned butt plugs and anal beads in the past but didnt use them more than once or twice because I didn't get much enjoyment out of them.

  When Junior and I started discussing the opportunity of being fuck buddies he mentioned that he liked anal sex, and that he would like it, but wasnt fussed if I didn't want to do it.  He understood my reasons not to - the time it takes to prepare, the potential mess and the planning involved that breaks the mood.

   All my reasons were mental blocks, more than me purley not liking anal sex, as I had never tried it with a partner before.  During my dalliances with Junior I have broken some of the mental blocks about other things, such as not liking semen inside me for too long and having to have things to clean off with instantly. 

  I got thinking of anal sex, and how it would play out between me and him, suggesting that we try it.  The idea kinda sat there for a while with both of us and we didn't try it the next time we saw each other, I thought he had forgotten about it.  Junior is awesome in many ways, but at this stage is not comfortable leading and initiating things which I expected him to with this due to being the one who has had anal before. Once we got going with it I found out that anal is really pleasurable for me, that I get turned on at the idea of someone taking me and owning me in such a way, that it feels dirty and wrong and taboo.  Anal sex for me is about trusting someone so completely and letting them take over my body.

  I like breaking the mental barriers I have placed on myself, it wasn't painful, there was very little preparation needed and if there was any mess, Junior was a gentleman and did not let me see it.  Sex between me and him is awesome and I really don't want it to stop!

However things are getting more complicated between us.  This isn't bad - we seem to be doing a lot of couple-y stuff like me meeting his friends, and spending a lot of time together just cuddling and being in each others company.  I wouldn't necessarily change this for anything as it is leaving me happy and fulfilled but sometimes it is a little confusing.  We are communicating with each other about it clearly, and feel the same which is good.  New relationship energy gets the better of me sometimes and makes me want to push things further than they should be - so I have to check myself to stop me from doing something silly.  it's not particularly stressing me out at the moment and I don't think it will be.  I'm just really happy to be getting fucked regularly and to be trying new things!

As an aside I will be changing Juniors nickname to Doc - as he does not like the current one!

new beginnings

It's been a while since I posted on here- there's several reasons for it, but I shan't bore you with them when i have something a lot more interesting to discuss!

    

I think I finally have a boyfriend :D

Me and S met about a month ago and have clicked quite well. due to me being unemployed and him being in a non 9 to 5 job we have managed so far to spend quite a bit of time together (this is about to change due to S' new job, but it's not a big deal as we will now have weekends) As it's been such a short amount of time I'm not really sure on things like titles (we don't really need them, but its why i *think* rather than just have)

    

 We share the same interests and some similar hobbies, and just like hanging out together. this last weekend with him i just chilled and watched him play black mesa on steam, happy to be with him.

It is however early days, and although we both feel confident that this is a viable relationship there are some things we need to do more carefully than others due to him (and by extension most likely me in the future) being polyamorous with another (more primary and established) relationship. There's also the fact that I have never had a committed romantic relationships so have nothing to base my experiences on. That however can be a whole other post when I've had time to think about the formats of it and analysed how I feel a little bit more. polyamory is a new type of relationship to me so I'm not the best person to be posting and talking about it.

   

All in all though the thought of spending time with him and actually being with him gives me the warm fuzzies that any relationship should

As a side note I am wondering how readers (if there are any) like the layout and format of the blog, eg the adverts and backgrounds, text formatting and colour scheme.  I'd appreciate some feedback on this as I would like to make this blog the best it can be. I know my spelling and grammar need improvement (which is tricky due to dyslexia) so there is that to work on.

Visit to a Strip club

On Friday night I met up with a friend I hadn't seen in a while and we decided to go to a strip club. It was my first visit to such a place, and it was quite fun if I am honest.
We visited a Platinum lace gentlemens club which are female friendly. There's the main bar area that has topless dancing and than an upstairs vip with the booths. While it is female friendly me and my mate were the only unacompanied females in there ( i.e women there without their boyfriends or a male) and it did raise a few eyebrows of the male clientele, one even wandering over and stating that we were lesbians! If I was more self concious it could have put me off I think. The club was clean, the bar was well staffed and there was a visibile prescence of security guards which I found comforting.
My first dance was pretty cool, having a pretty woman writhing about on your lap, groping you and shoving her boobs in your face is rather sexy, and the private dances at the club are fully naked ones. I was quite nervous at first, and found it hard to relax and enjoy it, I'm still not totally convinved that it's something thats really sexy, but I would be interested in going to a strip club with a partner, to see if buying dances and picking girls out for them would be sexy. By the end of the night I had had 4 private dances off of different women, and my friend had picked some of them for me, her judgement of women that I would find atractive was suprisingly good. My friend is straight and her eagerness at going to a strip club suprised me. I do wonder though at her eagerness and continual claims of "this is so cool, I love boobs" wether she was entirley comfortable with it.
While it was sexy there was always the thought that the women are only dancing for the money, and I personally have a hard time reducing attraction to a person down to a physical thing. It's not a cliche at all to say that I find personality more attractive than looks. Despite these issues I would go again. I even got a number off of a slightly drunk bloke, it's a shame i wasn't attracted to him.

In the beginning....

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